Unfortunately, due to my medical condition, I could not work. A lady whom I had been with behind bars had an organization that connected me to a church that embraced me. They held my hand and started to pay my rent. My kids went back to school, and they helped me with everything until I healed. When I had healed, I started working for the organization. Things were starting to look up and thought I was finally in a better place. Sadly there was more trauma ahead.

In December 2017, on my way home, I was gang-raped again by 6 men. It was dark outside but it wasn’t late. I used to get home around 9 p.m. They didn’t steal anything from me, they just left me there when they were done, torn and injured. I called somebody who responded promptly and I remember being taken to the hospital. I ended up spending Christmas in the hospital. I had another operation on my rectum. I then went back to work again following the operation.

Four months later, in April 2018, the same thing happened again. They broke into my home, raped and sodomized me again. They covered their faces with masks but I think they were the same individuals from before because I could recognize their voices and their cologne. I was traumatized and I shut down completely. They hurt me badly and left me for dead. Fortunately, I was taken to the hospital and got admitted. Even now, I don’t think I have brought myself to accept it because every time I tell my story, I tell it as though it happened to someone else.

Despite intense therapy, I have struggled physically and emotionally. I lost my job after the last assault and it was difficult to provide for my children. I couldn’t go to the washroom like a normal person. I have had to insert some medication for me to be able to go defecate. It has been a mental torture. We have had to sleep in incomplete buildings. I have thought of taking my life many times, but I think about all the things I have had to go through without a mother, and I tell myself that no matter what happens, I must be there for my children. That is what has kept me going.

I reported all of the incidents to the police who said they were investigating them but none of the cases has gone anywhere. No one has ever been arrested and charged. For so many times I felt that I was cursed because I’ve never had a moment of rest. I came to the point where I thought there was no God because how could a God allow all these things to happen to me? Despite the tragedies and all I have been through, I have managed by God’s grace to prevent resentment and hatred from creeping into my heart. I’m not bitter at all. I keep telling myself that even if I meet those men who did this to me, I will forgive them. I’ve also forgiven myself and I’m taking it a day at a time. Little by little, step by step I’m learning how to forgive my mother.”